The Evangelical Lutheran Church of America has voted against blessing same-sex unions and ordaining homosexual ministers. As a Lutheran minister being interviewed on NPR explains, there seems to be two gospels being preached in the Lutheran church: one, a gospel of affirmation, the other, a gospel of transformation.

Those who support blessing gay couples who are living in ‘committed relationships’ argue that Christ gives us the task of calling ‘all people.’ Therefore, the acceptance of Christ is much larger than our cultural norms.

True enough in general, but what does Christ give us the task of calling people to? Gay advocates would say that they are called to loving communion with the church; that the essence of Christ’s message is commitment in love, and they see homosexual relationships as being life- and love-affirming.

This perspective is understandable. Gays are not intrinsically sexual predators or obnoxious activists. The majority of gays live their lives quietly among us as without disturbing sensitivities, as they seek to be fulfilled relationally with other partners of the same-sex.

As is often said by the principled gay: “It’s not about the sex.” To be fair this is often true. Especially among lesbians, the relationship with other women often begins simply because men are seen as selfish and incapable of a committed relationship. Therefore a fulfilling relationship is sought with another woman who understands her emotions and can be a faithful partner.

Naturally sex is an intrinsic aspect of human behavior and becomes central in the relationship between the two women.

For men this is also often the case. However I am convinced that the motives are usually fundamentally different. Where women are by nature those who seek a secure relationship for the sake of emotional support and the nurture, men seek the new experiences in diverse settings, are quickly disinterested, and hesitant to make commitments in relationships.

This is only a slight twist from the created order. For indeed women are meant to be in secure and committed relationships. And men do in fact need to be versatile in the public sphere, easily adaptable and seeking new opportunities in order to guide wife and family through the turbulence of earthly life.

In love personal preference and natural tendency is laid aside for the good of another. So in a marital relationship the woman is meant not to strive to make the relationship what she wants it to be for the sake of her emotional well-being, but rather looks to her husband to guide and shape the relationship for her good. So also the man is not to expect the novel or the ever-enjoyable challenge at every turn, but rather seek to stabilize the relationship in a way that will give security and support to his wife. These principles apply to every aspect of their personal relationship.

But this is not the world that we find before us. Men and women are selfish, seeking only to fill those needs that they find in themselves. This is the reason that the gospel of Jesus Christ must be transforming. After all is not the essence of the gospel that of God taking on the form of a man to reunite people with his love? Is not transformation itself the means of embracing? And does not this transformation take place first in the person of Jesus? How then can we preclude such radical transformation of life when we are united with this love?

In the case of sinners (all people!), the gospel is certainly one of embracing acceptance–in the transformation of Christ!

Indeed, we serve a transforming Savior. He does not affirm any sexual preferences any more than he denies his own nature of self-sacrifice in which is found unique and true fulfillment.

Men seek the experience of sexual novelty with other men because other men seek the same selfish end. Women also selfishly seek emotional and sexual understanding from other women who seek the same such solidarity. But this is the antithesis of the self-denying, transforming love of Christ. They deny the grace of suffering and the refining fire that marriage to a radically different person is created to be.